After arranging my clothes in my suitcase, re-shuffling the few groceries I brought, I settled back on the sofa in the hotel, watching Sleepless In Seattle for the seventh or eighth time, perhaps more. When I spent hours in prayer asking God to remove me from His waiting room of trying to sell my house, little did I know He had another waiting room. This waiting room consists of being homeless.
I came from a deflated real estate market to a war, the war of bidding on already inflated prices. I see-I bid-I pray-I wait and now after several lost bids, I continue to pray and wait! But God! How often have I shared, “but God” knows and He remains in control. I’m always reminded as I read devotions and hear sermons on the times we feel God has forgotten us, He has not. He is always near and He truly does hear us.
As with the “now history” of showing my house more times than I can count, promised offers which never came or even those offers which were insultingly low, that part of my life is now history, as this “homeless” stage will be too when God brings me a house. This period alone has allowed me to spend time with my daughter and her family which was seldom and infrequent before moving to Texas. I’ve been able to hug those now young adult grandsons, as they came home from college, also to savor the joys and daily life of my grandchildren still living at home.
I’ve had time to participate in outings with car enthusiasts and frilly cowgirls, which I would not have been able to do, had I been busy settling into a new home. But most of all over these past years of trials, I have learned to “be still and know” that God is there, and He is always in charge of my life.
I chuckled silently during the recent sermon when the pastor spoke about keeping our eyes on the Lord when He directs us to do something. Just think about Peter-he took his eyes off the Lord and began sinking. Thus, I’m too tired, weary to “sink”, so I must keep my eyes on the Lord.
Do you ever find yourself in times like this when you say, “but God, why?” Why does Sally have a life filled with such joy? Why does Joe seem to be blessed and successful? Why do the Smiths have such a happy marriage? These “but God why’s” can cause us to sink. I do not understand the situations of my life, but I do know for certain that God is in charge.
I look forward to the day I can write in my blog, I have a new address. Until then, God said “come here Jane” and I’m following, not looking down or saying “Oh God, the storm is raging.” For if I did, I might sink. Psalm 46:10 NIV, “He says, Be still and know that I am God…”